NEWS
NEWS
NEWS
Do you know of any of the chicks from the Great Western Badlands who showed up riding nasty beasts of the Wasteland? Well it seems that one of them made a stop by the settlement of Ovarianess and has taught some of the fraus that inhabit this place how to ride those scary-as-fuck critters. So now it is not so unusual to find some beast riders among the normal lot of warriors from that settlement, which are really imposing. Some of the people who have encountered them say that they call themselves ‘amathiccs’ or something like that.
For some reason nobody understands, especially because now that we have discovered the existence of these megalopoli we know that the closest one has been kaputt for a while, there are still hightec hunters from those places who go around the Wasteland chasing people for sport. I bet in those places they still can finger themselves or wank each other off, so they be more happy and leave the rest of us in fucking peace.
During the last few years, for the people around this area of the Wasteland to mention Junkers was to think of Samanthia. This place out of the mind of Samantha O’Sullivan has become home to many of the members of this faction. However this is actually a recent happening, as until recently the Junkers were totally nomadic, never settling down anywhere. Well, it seems that there are some among them, led by a certain Wang, who consider that things should continue as they were in the old days, and that Samantha’s obsession with gadgets, steam and such things, is turning them into something they are not.
According to these people the Junkers need to go back being resource seekers in the remnants of the World of Before, nomadic traders or even explorers. To tell themselves appart from Samantha’s followers they call themselves Scavengers, which was one of the names by which this faction was also known in the past.
ANNOUNCEMENTS OF INTEREST
OR NOT, WHO KNOWS?
I, your expert meteorologist Billy the Rheumatoid, warn you that next week we are expecting some really bad storms, my joints are cranky.
REF: Billy
Are you afraid of drinking contaminated water? Don’t worry, in exchange for a few bullets I offer to drink that water and filter it through my kidneys so that it reaches you nice and pure.
Ref: Filterboy
NEWS OF THE MONTH
We guessin’ that you have already heard rumors in the last days, but now we make it official and we have to announce some very important changes in this Scrapbdridge Gazette.
From next month you will not be able to share the Gazette with your friends. We have been doing the maths and it turns out that people buy an issue and then share it among their colleagues and that’s not a profitable business for us. We have calculated that for every issue sold, up to 67 people read it, so we are losing 66 bullets every frackin’ month! And it’s all your fuckin’ fault, miserable rats. Because, of course, it has nothing to do with the fact that we raise prices more and more, or that we cancel sections you like at the slightest opportunity, or that the articles have a lower and lower quality, or that in the last few years there have been other newsletters with better quality (and cheaper on top of that). OK, it is true that when we started this business we were happy to encourage you to share the Gazette with your friends… but I don’t know why this has led you to believe that you could do it. So from now on when you buy a Gazette you are likely to be followed by a guy who, if sees you lending this wonderful newsletter to someone else, will give you a beating that will change your birthdate. But, since we are actually nice fellas, you can go around commenting on things you have read, but we will charge you an extra shell for each comment.
We are sure that these changes will make subscribers to the Gazette skyrocket like foam, because it is a foolproof plan no matter how you look at it. Any complains? Well, you should have chosen death!
